It was nearly four years ago that I wrote this in an old blog:

I'm still not over the novelty of my shiny new laptop. I keep trying it out in new places. Perhaps I'll compute in the music room, then the kitchen, then Heather's room, on my bed, and at the pub table. Okay, while some of the glamor of being able to sit anywhere and type on my computer has begun to wear off, I must say, I am really happy about the whole thing. My Daddy and Mum just gave it to me for graduation/starting college. I finally seem to be pulling stuff together for school. Linens are accumulating into a stack in the corner of my room. Lamps and bowls and other essentials are being gathered together, and I finally feel it approaching. I feel like this summer has been different from the other ones. Actually having a job makes the days pass fast, but the weeks drag on. It's an odd way to see it, but as the start of school looms ever closer, I begin to forget the duller parts of the past two months. Only the bright parts stick out. While I was immersed in it, it seemed like this summer didn't match up to the ones in years gone by, but now, in looking back, I think that all we ever see are the best parts. We forget about all the down time we've had as we work at school, and once a new one begins, we are amazed at how dull summer can be after a few weeks of it. Still, overall, I think I've enjoyed it. In three weeks I'll, like the rest of you, be starting brand new classes, while I'm filled with excitement that is mingled with a bit of anxiety and uncertainty. I keep playing out little scenarios in my mind of me going to classes, walking around campus, sleeping with another person across the room from me, and eating with complete strangers. I don't think any of that which rolls through my head will really be as I see it now, but I continue to think on it. Sometimes it makes me laugh, as I can have a vivid and wild imagination. I believe everyone's had some of the same thoughts as I have. Nothing really new. I've heard many tales from friends and family what their college years were like. Still, I wonder, what stories will I be able to tell my friends and children long after I have left this school, and many of the people around it?

I have a week and a half left in college. It is sinking in now, as I am finding out where I am going to work, finishing papers and presentations, and starting to pack my belongings into boxes. And as I cannot help being reflective, I have been thinking a lot about my time here at ULM. I have been thinking about the things I have done here, the people I have met, and how it has all changed me. I have turned into a much more confident person, but feel less original with that. I have built relationships around me that I would not trade for anything. I have loved many people, made connections and lost them. I have learned that I can get up in front of a large group of people and speak confidently, that I cry when I am angry, that I hate doing laundry, and that speaking my mind makes me happier than I was ever before. In my mind this list continues on and on, marking and checking events, people, and places over the four years I've had here. Parts have been good, and parts have been bad. But I can't help wondering how good my memory is. I keep thinking about what I wrote four years ago, how we only remember the bright parts. And now, another summer approaches, but my year will no longer begin in the fall. I won't have that time for reflection that I had every year. So really I keep wondering, what are going to be the bright parts now? What will stand out for me? I continue to build scenarios of my life just as I did when I approached the start of college. Only now they stretch much further. But honestly, my vivid imagination cannot bring together what lies in store for me. So the same feelings return; I'm filled with excitement that is mingled with a bit of anxiety and uncertainty. And because of that, I know it will all be okay. The things I recall from being here that shaped me and made me were proceeded by those emotions. It was hard, and it made me good. So, I gather my linens, bowls, books, and essentials to take away from this place, and I welcome the future as I leave the halls of this school and continue forward with my life.


Today at work I:
-Had the mug in my locker fall out and hit me on the knee.
-Knocked my mug of water over on my desk where it poured down into my purse and got my book and everything else wet.
-Somehow hit my leg while climbing out of the CO-OP van and got a hen egg bruise on my thigh from it.

I'm ever so slightly scared to leave. Who knows what other things might happen...
But I'm going to see Ryan when I get off in twenty minutes, which I am more than pleased about. Us working opposite shifts here leads to us not seeing much of each other during the week. This weekend is Caroline and Stephen's wedding. Ryan and I are headed to Monroe in the morning for it. I'm looking forward to seeing Laura and my other Monroe friends that will be there. It feels like ages since I've seen them, though it's only been a couple months really.


Free Pie

There is this place in Monroe we pass by all the time called Not Just Pie. We hear they have the most delicious pies in town, and though we talk about going there someday, that day never seems to be any day. So as we were sitting in the computer lab last week Nick mentioned to us that he had won a free slice of pie from Not Just Pie and he wanted to go there sometime soon. We decided we could go on Saturday. Finally, we would have this famous (though quite pricey as these things go) piece of pie.
So yesterday evening Laura, Nick, Ryan and I all piled into the car together and drove down to Not Just Pie. Our hopes were high. We had in mind what we would be having. We were already picturing the flaky crusts and whipped topping when we pulled up to Not Just Pie. But they were Just Not There. Though online the hours had been posted from 11-7pm, all we found were chairs on tables and the cold empty display cabinets staring blankly back at us as we peered through the windows.
In remorse we turned around. But we were stilled determined to have pie of some variety. We remembered another diner that had a sign outside of it advertising they had pies and more, so we drove down that way. While still in the car I turned around and told Nick I was sorry he wasn't going to get his free pie. He just shrugged his shoulders and laughed about it.
The diner was empty for the most part. An old couple sat in the back corner and a small family was off to our side. We were disappointed to hear they only had four different pies left but we ordered all the same. We wanted pie then and there. As our slices were placed down in front of us we all craned our heads over the pie, staring at our prey. Ryan had his hands clasped together in anticipation and we all murmured how good it looked. We then pick up our forks and dug in to chocolate and banana cream and pecan goodness. As we were scraping the last flecks of crust off our plates, and getting ready to pay, our waitress walked up to us and told us our pie had been paid for. The elderly gentleman in the corner had seen us praying before we ate. "You just don't see kids doing that these days," so he paid for our meal and left. As the waitress told us this Nicholas stared at me, eyes bulging, while he drank his water. Laura sat there with her mouth open and Ryan was looking blankly up at the waitress. So what do you say? You can't rightly tell the waitress that that was not a prayer the man was seeing but a preparation, setting the angle of attack. That bowing our heads and then looking at each other with a shine in our eye was not an amen. So in our shock, embarrassment, and guilt we were able to get out gratitude as the strongest feeling. We asked to the waitress to thank the man several times next time he came in(which he does quite regularly we found out). We sat there a while longer, drinking our water and just talking. Ryan decided we were going to have to go out of our way to do something nice for a stranger in order to pay back our free food. Our waitress walked up again to ask us what church we went attended. Laura ummmed and I shot Nick a look for him to speak. He told her the name of the Lutheran church which in all honesty he does attend every week, and she hmmmed and walked off with our plates. We left shortly thereafter.
And while I am not one for praying, especially before meals, I think that we got to express gratitude for what we had been given all the same. And it makes me want to do the same for someone I don't know. I think it might make my day to do that. So I guess we got not just pie after all.


I've been putting off too many things. Like restarting my computer, washing my jeans, and writing what I've wanted to. Maybe it's easier said than done though. I just returned from Austin, TX. I had a short visit with Sissy and Jeff. I am always happy to be in their company. In the morning I'm headed to Memphis. I come home from there on Sunday and I move back to Monroe on Wednesday. Summer passes much more quickly though the weeks have gotten longer. And I feel like there is something I'm forgetting to do. At least I've spent good time with the ones I cherish.

To bed with myself before another long drive, and I continue on with more text book narrative.


Excerpt from an old notebook

"The goldfish you won at the fair round-up in grade school. You carried them home in little sandwich bags that kept leaking and hardly stayed closed with the twist tie pinching it closed. You had two of them. Your family went out to Wal-Mart and bought a large glass bowl, some rocks, a couple jugs of water. You named the fish, they died. So you're stuck with a big bowl and some stinky bright purple and teal rocks a week later. Just dump out the rocks and put the bowl in the bath tub. You still cried though."


This weekend has been good for me. Hung out with David most of the time. I enjoy his company. We watched Labyrinth because I'd never seen it before and it is a great movie. Yesterday was Pi(e) Day, so we thought that a great excuse to bake a blueberry-raspberry pie. Let me tell you, that was one tasty pie. The berries popped and released such sweet juice in my mouth that reminded me of Memphis summers and 4th of July picnics. I'm afraid I won't be able to make it up there this summer, which is really upsetting. But perhaps it will work. I like to hope so. But back to this weekend, David and I also watched Wizard People, Dear Reader, which is an alternate voice over to the movie Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. I found it most amusing. It's done by the same person who did the Washington Rap.
In other news, the semester is now half way over. And I'm surprised at how much I am not excited about that. I'm kind of disappointed by that fact actually, because when this semester is over, I only have two more years here, and that seems like an awfully short amount of time in the scheme of things. What I was happy about on school related topics was that at Browse the Bayou we had at least three or four prospective majors. And I believe we had that many last semester, so I'm always glad to meet the new ones coming in to join us.

Other than that dear readers, I don't have much for you now. My apologies. Here's a dance and song I really liked if you wanted something entertaining to watch.

I almost forgot to tell you. I'm playing intramural softball with the AMS this week! Wish me luck! We all know how much I hurt myself with any type of throw-catch-swing-at-a-ball sports. Haha.


I'm flexing my fingers at this. I haven't written consistently in so long, and I remember how much I loved doing so when I did write. This weekend I did several things I hadn't done in so long. Today I went for a ridiculously long bike ride. I ride my bike to class everyday, but that is so different from the feeling of pedaling down streets for only the sake of moving. The air was warm, not hot, and it brought back memories of my childhood, riding down streets and under trees, past cars and houses and open grass. It made me happy.
I also decided to start stretching again. My muscles have grown too short and stove up. Without flexibility we are all old. I began to remove the stiffness from my body, lying on the floor, breathing slowly, and trying to remember the moves from my old yoga class as I ripped and tore loose the bindings on my legs, sides, back, and all. I'm sure I'll be sore all over in the morning, but right now I feel great, so I'll remember that as I draw out my body tomorrow.
Friday evening I went with David to a cookout at his friend's house and had a great time. I squished up hamburgers for the first time. I guess that is a basic skill I needed to learn. I met a few members from the water ski team, all of whom were from foreign countries, and thoroughly enjoyed my time there. I watched a couple awesome movies, read, and didn't mind the time change as much as I usually do. This weekend was a much needed one after three major tests last week and the stress I was feeling from that. Now I'm feeling peaceful and rested and happy with my friends. I hope all of you are just as well.